Posted by: joshjasper | February 12, 2010

Where you at dads?

Kudos to NICC (Northeast Iowa Community College) for allowing me to give a 2 hour training last night about the important role that fathers play in the lives of their children.  We know that fathers are one of the great, often untapped, resources in the lives of their children.  What dads actually do with their kids matters more than how often they do it.  There were close to 25 people in attendance, which I thought was a pretty good number for this topic.

By the way, of the 25 people present, 25 were women.

We had a number of great conversations about the incredible influence that men have with their children.  We explored the reasons why some men struggle with fatherhood and how those very struggles can be overcome.  But for what?  Sure, it’s great that so many women care so deeply about the father-son/daughter relationship, but if we are going to really talk about fatherhood, don’t we need to have men in the room?  Imagine how powerful it would have been for a man to be sharing his feelings about being a good father.  Other men could have heard guys talk about the difficulty they have with showing affection toward their kids.  A few guys could have shared about the pressure they feel to conform to masculine stereotypes that often make it more difficult for men to be caring, loving, attentive fathers.

The men in the room could have heard me give positive reinforcement for their efforts.  They would have felt empowered to continue the things they are doing and would have left the evening knowing that other men are watching them; hoping that more guys model this type of nurturing behavior.

I applaud the women last night that attended the training.  There is no doubt they left with a few more tools in their toolboxes; with the hope to share them with the men in their lives.


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